Sabaku no PARTY!
by 957
Summary: Gaara involuntarily is holding a party. Invited: everyone! Refreshments: yes! Result: UTTER CHAOS!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own it. No. I don't.

A/N: In this fic, Suna and Konoha are really close…or something.

Sabaku no PARTY!

Summary: Gaara (involuntarily) is holding a party! Invited: everyone! Refreshments: yes! Result: UTTER CHAOS!

Chapter 1

"Gaara, be sure to keep the house clean for today. I'm going to be out until pretty late," Kankurou, the puppeteer and sand shinobi from Sunagakure, called to his little brother. "Can't trust Temari on these things too much, you know? Anyway, I'll be seeing you guys later."

The red-haired figure sitting atop his mainly unused bed twitched.

Whoever pictured Gaara as a housemaid, actually CLEANING THE HOUSE…

Would be facing a very slow and painful death…

Gaara twitched again. This was certainly a disturbing thought. He slowly unfolded his legs and stood up.

"Temari," he said quietly. Said blonde kunoichi appeared around the corner of the living room. "Yes?"

"I expect you to clean the house today, and keep it clean. I will take no part in this activity."

"Gaara, you heard Kankurou! He said it would be your job to do that!"

"Then you heard him too. He also said he didn't trust you on this." Gaara smirked as Temari fumed silently. "So are you going to prove him wrong or what?"

Before she could answer Gaara was at the front door.

Temari inhaled and exhaled as slow as she could. She knew that her brothers knew that she absolutely _hated_ cleaning. And cooking, for that matter. And a bunch of other things, too, including garlic and fish and the color pink.

Just as she was regaining her composure Gaara added, "And don't forget to make lunch. Kankurou's room is messy. And those windows have a touch of filth on them…"

He left immediately after that. By now Temari was practically bashing her head against the wall and planning the many things she would do to her brothers with her fan when they got back. Her thoughts included the television and sushi…

When Temari was sure that her youngest brother had left, she approached the windows and inspected them. They were absolutely spotless, save for the… few smudges…created by…_Gaara's sand_...

Her eyes were on fire now. Temari sat down, thinking hard. After a few moments, she was rewarded with an evil…very good…EXCELLENT… idea. She rubbed her hands together, dug for and found an old dusty address book in Kankurou's dresser, sat down with pen and paper and began to write. They would pay dearly…

* * *

Haruno Sakura, a cheerful yet short-tempered pink-haired teenager, skipped down her driveway towards the sidewalk.

She reached the mailbox and deftly pulled out all the envelopes, magazines and whatnot. Scanning through the pile of mail, she stopped in surprise when she found a letter directed to her.

"Eh? Who would send a letter to me…?" She wondered aloud. A thought formed. "Ooh, maybe it's from Sasuke-kun!" She hugged the envelope to her chest and skipped back up to her house, completely forgetting about the other mail in her dreamy state.

"Now, let's see…" Sakura was safely in her room when she slit the envelope open and began to read.

-

"Ino, would you get the mail?"

"Egh… sure thing, Mom," Yamanaka Ino called. She was a curvy girl with long blonde hair and a sometimes flirty attitude. She stepped outside of her family's flower shop and headed for the mailbox.

"Hm… a letter for me..." she murmured. "How interesting. Very, very interesting…" (A/N: Okay here Ino just sounds creepy… None of them get a lot of mail.)

-

Shikamaru didn't even bother to check the mail. It was eventually his father who brought it in with his letter.

"Troublesome," he muttered once he finished reading it.

-

Tenten the weapons mistress stopped her training, panting, once she heard the mailman come around the corner toward her living area. He was carrying a small box and a tiny stack of envelopes in his arms.

It wasn't this often that Tenten got mail. She watched as he struggled to lift the box and continued until he reached the front of her apartment. He was about to set everything down when Tenten suddenly reached into her weapon pouch, pulled out a kunai, and sent it hurtling toward the box. It sliced through the string the mailman was holding it by and fell towards the ground.

Tenten was there in a flash to catch it, envelopes and all.

She looked up and smiled politely at the now scared looking man, and said, "Thank you, sir. Hope you have a nice day!"

His rude reply was that of turning heel and running.

Tenten straightened with a sigh as she headed back to her apartment. "How come they always do that…"

-

"Sssssasssuke-kun, go check the mail."

"No."

"…Sssssassuke-kun, go check the mail."

"Never. Leave me alone."

"Sssassuke-kun…_go check the mail_," a voice hissed inside his mind.

"AAGHH! FINE! JUST GO AWAY!" the raven-haired "prodigy" screamed, holding his head with his hands and trying to shake off the hideous voice.

He ran out of his house and to the mailbox and in a swift movement, reached in and took out a few envelopes. Then he raced back inside and shouted, "There! Are you happy now?!"

"...Sssassuke-kun, go read the mail."

"A-AGGH!"

-

A white-eyed Hyuuga Neji blinked as he came upon the stack of envelopes crammed in the mailbox. He glanced over all of them and stopped at one.

"…Hinata-sama, please come here and receive your letter."

Hyuuga Hinata, the shy Hyuuga heiress, looked up with pearly lavender eyes. "…A letter? For me?"

"It seems so. Please come get it," her cousin replied with a very slight hint of annoyance in his voice.

"O-oh yes. Arigatou."

As she hurried away with the envelope clutched tightly in her small hands, Neji continued looking over the letters. He stopped again to find several for him.

He opened and read over it. "Well…"

-

"Ah, ramen, ramen, ramen, ramen…"

A carefree and laidback blonde, by the name of Uzumaki Naruto, had only one thing on his mind.

"RAMEN!"

I think you can all guess it.

He walked around with his instant ramen, slurping from the cup with a pair of chopsticks. "Hm… ramen ramen ramen ramen… get the mail?" He shrugged and opened the mailbox to find one, precious letter inside.

He became all teary-eyed. "OH, RAMENGOD, THANK YOU FOR THIS WONDERFUL BLESSING!"

This was basically the first time he'd ever gotten a letter. Naruto rushed inside to read it, even forgetting about…

…his ramen.

-

"Ah, the springtime of youth! How youthfully lovely! The youthful springtime of youthful youth shall youthfully remain youthful forever with youth!" an energetic person, clad in a green jumpsuit, exclaimed.

Yes, it was none other than Rock Lee, with his extremely youthfully bushy eyebrows and bowl cut like a mushroom.

"Haha…I'm feeling strangely happy today… must be something I youthfully ate earlier. Or maybe - ! This is the day Sakura-san will be amazed by my youthful youth and finally ask me out! Yes!" Lee grinned, showing his sparkling teeth, and then said, "Time to check the mail."

A few moments later, you could hear him scream halfway across Konoha, "HOLY MOST YOUTHFUL FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH! COULD THIS BE?!"

-

Temari was grinning like an idiot. In a mere few hours, her preparations would cause her plan to fall in action…

Operation: Reek Horrific Revenge On Idiot Brothers By Holding A Party (ORHROIBBHAP) commence!

It was time to PARTY!

A/N: I wonder…how this will turn out…sigh… in case some didn't get it Temari sent out invites for a party to reek revenge on Gaara and Kankurou…? I dunno..


	2. The Party Begins

Chapter 2

The party begins

"I'm back," Gaara said monotonously. He was suddenly greeted by a loud Temari.

"Oh, you're _back_! That took such a long time! Where were you?" Temari smiled at him.

"…Nowhere of interest to you…"

"Well, come inside to the kitchen. I made lunch!" She bustled inside and cautiously Gaara followed.

_Something's wrong._

"Sit down and have a bowl of toast before you do, Gaara, my big baby brother!"

_I can smell it._

"Temari…"

"Yes?" She was currently holding a spatula between her teeth and beating the crap out of a piece of bread with it.

"…Are you high?"

She stopped, eyes blank and uncomprehending, with that idiotic looking spatula still in her mouth. "…Eh?"

"Yes, Temari. Are you high?"

She laughed. "Of course not! Where in your gourd of sand would you get that idea?"

"…Hm…"

Gaara suddenly said, "The chickens rise high in the night with their scales flapping happily into the morning sun."

"TOTALLY! You got the meaning of 'supalicious' there, big sista!"

"…"

Gaara's eye twitched a couple of times. _…She's definitely high…on sharpie? Or maybe that bowl of toast she was talking about earlier… white-out?_

Temari let out a high-pitched off-key (can laughter even be off-key?) giggle and hiccupped. "Agblahoddles… must be that contaminated bug spray I drank earlier…maybe the stuff I put in it, too… THE WINGED BUNNITS DIG SHALLOW OVER THE MORNING MOON… THE NIGHT CLOUDS… THE PURPLE STARS…"

Gaara started twitching uncontrollably. "...I think I'm going to skip lunch today..."

"Hehe… don't go, baby water bottle! You haven't...seen the curtains...fly low through...your pet sand birdies...yet..."

When Gaara got back to his room, he was a twitching, unstable mess. It had been a very scary two minutes back there… Maybe he should consider skipping lunch for the rest of his life, perhaps even all his meals if _Temari_ was there…

Meanwhile, a certain blonde kunoichi was snickering downstairs.

"Man...hahaha...that was so FUNNY...can't believe he actually fell for it...haha...the _look_ on his face...hahahaha..."

She wiped her tears of laughter away. "I can't believe that the time it took to make up all of that nonsense was worth it...damn...too bad my camera ran out of battery...Oh well..."

TIMEASKIPATOAPARTYATIMEA

The doorbell rang.

Temari perked up. She had been waiting for this moment for _centuries_!

Okay, maybe just a few hours.

She ran to the door and opened it, to reveal two figures.

One had pink hair.

The other blonde.

And they were whispering rather loudly to each other.

"...Ahem..."

They looked up, startled. "Oh, hi! Tem...Temor?"

"No, I think it's Temori."

"No way, it has to be Remori!"

"...You've got it wrong. It's Afagdo."

"Eh?!"

"My name's Temari," said blonde growled.

"Oh...hehe..." Sakura and Ino rubbed the back of their heads. "Gomen, gomen..."

"Anyway... come in."

"...Is it safe?" Sakura whispered.

"...What do you mean? You got invited...to a party..."

"No, but...isn't this Gaara's house?"

"Yeah...who knows what he might do to us..."

Temari snorted. "Are you kidding me? My brother's not the scary emo 'I'm-gonna-kill-you-right-after-I-finish-my-cookie' person you might think he is. In fact... he's rather easy...and fun...to...how should I put it..._manipulate."_

"..."

"Whatever, just come in."

The girls had barely done so when the doorbell rang again. Temari opened the door to reveal a bored looking Shikamaru, a blank-faced Neji, and a twitching Sasuke.

"Hey guys," she greeted, then stopped. "Hey...the three of you seem like the people least likely to attend a party...at short-notice...and all... okay, WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH THE OWNERS OF THE BODIES YOU ARE CONTROLLING?!"

"Relax," Shikamaru said. "I'm here because my father read the letter you sent and forced me to go...geez, so troublesome."

"I'm here because Hinata-sama wished to go and she must have an escort...and company at this...party..." Neji stepped aside to reveal his shy cousin, who was currently poking her two index fingers together.

"Hm...and what about you?" Temari asked, pointing to Sasuke.

Twitch

"I'm...crashing this place...because I really want to escape Orochimaru..."

Cricketchirp

"...The voice inside my mind..."

Chirpchirpchirpchirp

"...JUST LET ME IN."

"Sure...crazy emo kid." Temari whispered the last part.

"I am NOT EMO!"

"Oh yes you are...now all of you, hurry up inside before I think to whip my fan out and deal some serious damage here."

They went inside.

The rest of the party guests appeared at the door as follows:

Naruto

Tenten

omg, LEE

Everyone gathered in a circle on the floor in the living room.

"So, what are we gonna do at this party?" Naruto said.

Tenten whacked him over the head. "Baka, stop being so impatient and listen."

"First, let's...do something together...and then you guys can do whatever you want," Temari answered.

"Is there food?" Naruto asked.

"Yep."

"Awesome!"

"K, we can start."

"Hm...what do you guys wanna do?"

"Duh..."

"Isn't it obvious?"

"A-apparently w-w-we do this in e-every s-story with a p-p-party."

"...What?" Naruto scratched his head.

"TRUTH OR DARE!"

"Hey, what's going on here?" A grumpy voice sounded.

Everybody froze. Temari just smiled wickedly and said, "Come down here, Gaara, and join the party. I'm sure you'll be interested..."

* * *

review plz... 


	3. Truth or dare

Chapter 3

Truth or Dare

"So, will you play with us now?"

"…"

"Answer, damn it!"

"…"

"Gaara," Temari said slowly with menace creeping into her voice, "you're not hoping to get mashed into potatoes, are you?"

Said redhead sighed. "I still don't understand how potatoes relate to fan-bashing, salmon, or my playing of this game you speak of."

"What's your point?"

"…_Why_ exactly am I captive by this plate of sushi?"

"Well…that…was part of the plan, but it didn't turn out like I hoped…anyway… Will you play Truth or Dare with us now?"

"…If I do, will Sushi-sama let me go?" His eye twitched as he said this.

"Yes, Sushi-sama will let you go. If you play."

Gaara sighed. "Fine. I'll play."

That elicited several squeals, snorts, and other noises from the patiently waiting bunch of people in the other room, who inevitably were listening in on the sand shinobis' awkward conversation.

"Now let me go… you idiotic plate of sushi. And you, the California roll-" Gaara picked up the piece of sushi with his sand and crushed it, "I've hated you since the start."

He froze at the glare Temari was giving him, and then said, "…My sincere apologies, Sushi-sama. Gomenasi… yes, I do believe that sushi can – what was that? Ah, yes…rule the…world…"

Gaara's eye started twitching like mad. Temari stifled a guffaw and then started whacking him with her fan and leading him to the other room.

"Come on, let's play now!" she exclaimed, sitting Gaara down beside a random person, who happened to be Sasuke.

"Fine. Start is me." Ino looked around and said, "Hinata, truth or dare?"

"D-dare."

85.6666667 of them gasped. "Hinata-sama, you do remember what we discussed this afternoon?" Neji gasped.

Hinata pouted cutely. "Aw! But nii-san (sp.?), there's no fun in that-"

…_She looks so cute when she pouts…wait, what am I thinking?!_ Naruto thought.

"…Hinata-chan, because I take mercy upon your poor soul, I shall give you an easy one," Ino said. "I dare you to… kiss…someone."

Hinata almost fainted. That was what Ino considered an easy dare?! But if it was… Hinata couldn't imagine what other, much eviler things Ino could come up with. Fortunately. They probably would pollute her innocent mind.

"Ino-chan, you s-said… 'someone', not a certain person or… now t-that it c-comes to mind… a specific gender."

Neji gasped again, this time louder than anyone else… Because he was the only who did. "Hinata-sama, please do not tell me that you're-!"

Hinata began blushing a very deep shade of tomato. ("Ripe Red Hundred-Shade Tomato Blush no Jutsu!")

"…I would smack you over the head for thinking such a thing, but since I'm not that close to you and all… I won't," Ino told Neji. "So, is there anyone, preferably a girl that slaps hard, who is sorta close to him and is willing to make him pay for this horrible, awful, nasty, perverted, awful, stupid accusation? Anyone?"

"Ooh, me! I probably know Neji better because he's on my team… and I don't know how hard I slap, but I can pattern some red stripes and such with some kunai of mine," Tenten said brightly. "Oh, and there are the kutanas… the many, many shuriken… my new samurai sword… nunchuks… throw in some chains…and bloodshed. Yes, there must be blood."

Neji shuddered.

"Anyway, to get back on topic… Hinata, I was going easy on you! Just kiss anyone of your choice who's here right now… and I wasn't sure which way you swung, so…you're very observant."

She was blushing furiously, yet again close to fainting.. ("Numba Two Version! Dark Cherry Tomato Thousand Shade Raspberry Mix Blush no Jutsu!")

"…Please, just do the dare."

Hinata gulped. She gathered her courage and stood up on shaky legs.

"A-alright…" She slowly walked up to her person of choice and leaned closer for the kiss…

Everyone's eyes widened.

A/N: Pardon my strange, amateur language use of the weapons… I'm not to familiar with them and all… don't take the samurai part seriously…

If you guys have any certain pairing-hint request or any suggestion, plz tell!

Also…

Do the readers out there prefer long chapters updated in every once in a while, short chapters updated quickly, or medium-length chapters updated in between?

PLUS…

I know who Hinata probably would kiss… and I would've done that… but if it ends up very differently… WHO SHOULD IT BE

THAT SHE CHOOSES

TELLTELLTELLTELLTELL

Review plz ;) (;


	4. TODASTBMBJTODFN

Chapter 4

TODASTBM, BJTODFN

(A/N: Are you wondering what the chapter title means? ...TRUTHORDAREANDSPINTHEBOTTLEMAYBEBUTJUSTTRUTHORDAREFORNOW

shhh... and thanks to those for the reviews and suggestions. your reviews practically force me to write...so here is the 4th chapter!)

"Mwah."

Everyone looked horrified.

Veryshort Flashback:

_"…Please, just do the dare."_

_Hinata gulped. She gathered her courage and stood up on shaky legs._

_"A-alright…" She slowly walked up to her person of choice and leaned closer for the kiss…_

_Everyone's eyes widened._

_Hinata pecked Gaara on the cheek and backed away._

_Everyone looked horrified..._

WE'RE BACK!

Gaara blinked, flushed, became normal, blinked, and started muttering.

You could hear him say the most random things... "...Sushi-sama...please take me back...yes, sushi can...world...sor...california roll..."

Refer to previous chapter if you don't understand ;)

"EH? Why'd you do that, Hinata?!"

"Well..." she blushed prettily, "Gaara was just looking...really...cute, like a teddy bear."

_Ngh... how'd she find out about my secret obsession for teddy bears?_ Gaara thought groggily. _At least my other secret obsession of cookies remains hidden._

"Hey, everyone, I found a secret stash of cookies in Gaara's dresser!" A loud voice called from above.

_Wonderful... Remind me to shred your fan, Temari._

"H-Hinata-sama, you understand the consequences of such an action, do you?"

"Neji-nii-san, you do understand the consequences for thinking I'm not straight, do you?" Hinata giggled and Ino complimented her friend's wonderful newfound ability to say such a sentence without blushing or stuttering.

Neji's face paled and reddened.

"Now really, we should be getting back to the game. These scenes are taking up too much space," Sakura said, annoyed.

"Ossu!"

"Y-yes ma'am."

"Troublesome..."

"..."

"Gomen, Sakura-chan," Hinata said, giggling again.

"No, my point is that we really need to get back to the game..."

"Oh... then Sakura, truth or dare?"

She froze. "Uh...truth."

Hinata thought carefully. "Ano...What do you think of Neji nii-san?"

"Uh... he totally looks like a girl," insert Neji famous Gonnakillyoukillkillkillyou glare, "Cause of his long hair, but it's pretty cool, and overall he's kinda hot."

"No,_ I _think he's kinda hot!" Ino argued.

"No, _I _think he's the hottest!" Tenten blurted out.

Silence.

"Tenten, I didn't know you were going for Neji," Ino said with a knowing smirk.

"Yeah, Tenten...Why don't you tell us about what you two do when you're alone?" Sakura put in with such generosity.

Her face reddened considerably. "W-well, w-why don't you-"

"Hm, I guess I should ask her that on my turn," Sakura murmured, an evil glint in her eyes.

Tenten's own chocolate brown ones widened.

"Kay, Tenten, truth...or dare?"

"Dare," she said immediately.

Ino and Sakura exchanged smirks, while the guys (excluding a red-face Neji) snorted, smirked slightly, and called loudly for ramen.

"Well, how about, I dare you to," Sakura stood up, slithered over to Gaara, and whispered into his ear, where colorful musical notes flew out his other ear and disappeared into Tenten's. Gaara was inwardly groaning. _Why me, why me, why me?_ while Temari watched her little brother with amusement and her own collection of smirks. Her plan was playing perfectly, and she barely had to do a thing.

Tenten's face matched one of Hinata's best blushes as the musical notes finally disappeared. Sakura slithered back to her spot, flicking a forked tongue out at Ino, who flew away in gratitude with her enlarged ears.

"Is this a magic show? This is awesome! You're awesome, Sakura-chan!" Naruto yelled loudly, clapping. "More! More! Oh, hey, ramen-man, toss me some ramen! Let's watch the football show!"

Hinata was smiling sweetly on the outside, but inside she was chanting, "Naruto-kun Naruto-kun Naruto-kun Naruto-kun..." Her eyes narrowed as she watched her beloved blond shout encouragement to the slithering, hissing Sakura.

"Squawk!" Shikamaru yelped as Kiba bowled him over.

Wait, Kiba?

"I'm crashing this party!" He whooped, before proceeding to jump onto the ceiling and stick there, before making his way to swing on the fan.

"AGH!"

Hinata whipped around at the sound of her love screaming. _Naruto-kun!_

"GET THIS THING - OFF ME!"

With Hinata's timid help, he managed to throw off the rope of ramen that was strangling him.

"Why, ramen, why?" he sobbed to it, ignoring Hinata's attempts to comfort him.

"_You left me to go to this idiot party_," it hissed, flicking its...tail.

"I-I'll repent my badness, Ramengod! Really! I will! I-I promise! I d-don't go back on promises!"

"Do you even know what you're saying?" Shikamaru asked.

Naruto fervently shook his head.

Shikamaruu shrugged and went off to find himself some popcorn.

Naruto and his ramen noose left to eat ramen together (CANNIBAL).

Poor Hinata was left alone.

Her eyes glowed.

Not the pearly white-lavender they usually were...

but instead a blood red.

* * *

A/N: OMG! HINATAS POSSESED! Too bad for Naruto that he's too stuck on ramen... 

Please don't mind the complete and total chaos that ensued in the middle of this chapter.

Please review...!


	5. You Still There?

OMGIAMSOOOSORRYTHATIDIDNTUPDATEFORSOOLONG…

I didn't have any time… -.-

U don't buy that, do u.

Well, ill try to be updating faster/more now

Here's another addition…

Chapter 5

You Still There?

"Hey, Hinata… you ok?"

The Hyuuga looked up timidly to see a bored Shikamaru. She wanted to scream about how _not_ okay and mad and frustrated she was and tear after Naruto and tie him up and do [censored things … then she spoke.

"Yeah. I'm o-okay."

"That's good."

They stood around a while, not saying anything, watching Ino and Sakura flit around, Kiba swing on the fan, Tenten swooning after Neji, Naruto sulkily wandering around in a dark corner with his ramen noose, Temari sneaking upstairs with a futile furtive look on her face…

Wait…

"After her!" Shikamaru shouted, his index finger pointing towards the stairs. Everyone stopped and stared at him.

"Quiet!" Hinata hissed.

"Oh." Shikamaru rubbed his head sheepishly. "After her!" he whispered.

"Was that better?"

Hinata nodded approvingly. "Good boy."

They raced up the stairs, caught up in the idea of exposing Temari and whatever evil plans she had cooked up. And, knowing how Temari is at cooking, those evil plans were sure to be pretty mutated…

"Stop!" Hinata whispered as they passed an almost-but-not-quite closed door. "Listen!"

They listened.

"…know how much I hate social activities and big crowds…alone type of…Temari!"

They could actually hear the smirk in her response.

"Well, there's nothing you can do about it now, _baby brother_."

She snickered.

Hinata thought she could feel the heat of the redhead's fuming.

Or it was just her.

"Temari…" he hissed. "I will _get_ you one day..."

Despite herself, she shivered. Gaara could be scary when he wanted to be. She shrugged it off and grinned. "You just try and do that."

Hinata and Shikamaru had crept to one side of the door by now, and could just see one side of Gaara's face. They stared, wide-eyed, as the black-rimmed aqua eyes grew bigger and wilder, and Gaara was grinning ferociously, not unlike a completely untamed tiger. "Oh, I will, sister, I will…"

They were still staring, open-mouthed, as Gaara melted slowly into a puddle of sand and promptly slithered out under the door, not even paying attention to the two eavesdroppers.

Temari came out a few seconds later, and nearly jumped back in surprise at Hinata and Shikamaru – or rather, their _faces._

They were still frozen.

"Um, guys? Why are you here?" she asked suspiciously. "Wait, you didn't just hear… oh, sh-"

"We won't tell anyone, no one, nobody, not anybody!" Shikamaru gasped as he stumbled over his words. "Just spare us, _spare us!_"

He stopped, looking around wildly, and grabbed Hinata by her sleeve. "No, take her! Take the girl first!"

Hinata took her sleeve out of Shikamaru's grasp and gently slapped him.

"You still with us?" Temari asked curiously as Shikamaru started hallucinating.

"Y-yeah," he wheezed out.

After a cup of hot lemonade and a few quiet words, he was calmed.

"So, this was all a scam?" he asked evenly, when they were all seated in a separate room.

She shifted uncomfortably. "Well, not exactly a scam, but yes – it was to get back at my brothers," she added at his questioning gaze.

"Continue."

"You see, Gaara and Kankurou both know my… distaste for cleaning, and such… and Kankurou left for the day, telling Gaara to clean up… then Gaara told _me_ to clean up… with a bunch of other _un-_neccesities… he left too, then I devised a brilliant plan of inviting a bunch of people over to make the house a wreck and a mess, because believe it or not, Kankurou is a neat freak. And Gaara, as you know, is an anti-social person…"

She broke off.

"So, basically put, you threw this party to piss them off," Shikamaru deadpanned. Temari nodded and grinned sheepishly. "Was it a bad idea…?"

"Not necessarily, but not the best. I could have thought of a bunch of better ones… but I don't feel like it," he added for the benefit of the skeptical look Temari threw at him.

"So… Kankurou will see the mess when he does come home, and Gaara is already…weirding me out… what do we do?"

"Clear out the house," Shikamaru suggested immediately. Temari looked at him, alarmed.

"No, not clean, clear out the people," he said quickly.

"Why, though?"

He shrugged. "Kankurou will be pretty mad, and you don't want the others to get in the way. You should be used to it by now… you have experience, where we don't. if you do let them stay, and they are somehow injured in the Kankurou's… rampage, then I doubt they will come back the next time you want them to, intention or not."

"…Sure," Temari said. She hadn't been listening to more than half of his unusually long speech/lecture/explanation.

"O-ok, so how do w-we start?" Hinata asked.

"Well, we can pretend there's an unpleasant creature in the house," Shikamaru said.

They all looked at each other.

"Oh."

There already was one.

[not that Gaara is unpleasant…! He just can get a 'lil crazy sometimes…

"So, let's go! Split up, do whatever you can! And try to make them make a bigger mess while you're at it," Temari added as they sprung up.

"It's a mission!"

"What team?!"

"WILDNINJAS!"

"WHAT TEAM?"

"WILLLDDDNENNNNJAASSSS!"

They all slapped a high-five and jogged away in different directions.

5 seconds later…

"Oh, wait." They all muttered in sync. "It's _that_ way." Point. Quick cough. Fast walk extended into run.

Mission commence!


End file.
